Why do computer printers get wonky, even long after they've been set up and working???????? if you listen, you'll hear me SCREAMM !!

Just a string of symbols for expletives won't cut it.  So, God Damn Fuck Shit.

My accountant is coming Monday and there is only one more document I need.

From my bank. I, just over an hour ago, went on line and found it is now ready and I downloaded it.  YAY. I won't have to cancel the appointment.

 Much to my dismay,  when I hit print, I got nothing. No sound of the machine warming up, no annoying pings, no drawer slowly inching its way out.  Initially, not even an error message.

For some reason, Adobe Reader hasn't been my friend lately. I think that may be due to having Windows 10 on one search engine and not on the other that I use most of the time. Of course, I know nothing much about technology so it's not a shock that things don't work. And what Ijust wrote may be complete nonsense with me using words that I hear about computers, but using them incorrectly.

So, I tried in the "engine "that uses Windows 10. No luck there either, in printing.  Except that I did finally get an error message that I've never seen before. A weird message about Acrobat not being able to read *a something about the statement.* I have no idea what they were writing about.  It had letters and all sorts of things I couldn't comprehend. There was a place on the page that asked if I wanted to convert the file. Of course I couldn't find the "file" they wanted to convert. I kept trying. It kept asking. Then,
it wouldn't let me convert from Acrobat to PDF,  which I thought was the same. Or at least I think that it,..... Actually I'm not even going to bother to finish this sentence. I'm clueless.  Possibly Adobe knows I'm Jewish and that I don't really want to convert.

Anyway. I kept trying. I even put in new Black ink, which I almost needed, but I was waiting until the paper came out striped. *(AD) If you put ink in every time they tell you it's low, you are losing about 1/3rd to 1/4th of the ink you have left. Bunch of robbers.

For some reason, although my Epson printer isn't on a network, I believe it thinks it is because it's wireless,  and I have about 4 different options to choose from to set as my default printer, even though there is only one printer.  What the hell is that about?  * Advice from me to you.   Don't call Epson for  help.

The child who helped me last time, had me uninstall and reinstall it a year ago and that did not help and  he couldn't understand why. That gave me a lot of confidence in them. At least he spoke English.

I don't remember how I worked it out, so it worked, but it did. ( I may have had a computer tech come in then. I don't remember). 

I will no longer call or email for help. What they do is pour water on the drowning.

This goes for most sites that now, for help, give you a list of possible things you can do, and they are never ever what I am looking for. Then, they ask if it helped. I hit no. They ask why. They never get back to me. I assume this would be much the same as writing a letter to Santa, the Easter Bunny or someone who is dead.

Lastly, I went to the control panel and chose the same network that has been working for the last few months. I reset my Wi-Fi password.

You got it. I didn't get it. Nothing, nada, zilch. No printing. Only the same old error message that at least I was familiar with. 

Then I remembered, "When all else fails, pull the plug".  So I rebooted.  As the computer roared to life, so did the printer. At the same fucking time. I hadn't even logged in and it was spitting out one, no two copies of what it absolutely refused to do before.
 Thankfully I was able to cancel  more copies or I would now have 7 of them.


MY THEORIES as I have several of them:

• Printers are stupid and although I said that stupid could be fixed, I was obviously wrong when it comes to machines.
• The manufacturer's build in defects to drive us crazy so after a while, even though the printer isn't all that old, we can't stand looking at it and buy a new one. Usually, just after you have purchased a complete set of ink cartridges at over $90.
• Printers have defective memories, like mine. They can only remember things from the past, so current information is considered an error.
• My personal electronic energy field messes with all types of electronic devices. When something electronic stops working, if I leave and my energy field follows, it will work for the next person who uses it.
• Seriously. There are days when I really can't take it. I know that life doesn't go smoothly and I am blessed in many ways. However, I believe that time is a precious commodity that shouldn't have to be wasted on fixing what should always be working.  THAT'S IT! I'M DONE.