Dr. G's Ridiculous Theories and Advice: WHY IS OUR HAIR SO LINKED TO OUR SELF ESTEEM AND SEX?????

Kama Sutra Look at all that long lovely hair.

I had my hair straightened today, well, now it was yesterday, for the first time in 8 or 9 years. Instead of going through that expensive, time lengthy, bore me to tears, treatment, I've been flat ironing my hair instead. It works nicely. Well, maybe except in Florida. It kinda limits has some limits.

If I do anything outside in the humidity or rain, it poufs out and or frizzes and ripples. If I go into the pool for a dip, I have to wrap my hair around my head like a Sikh would his turban.

Ridiculous. I know. That, however, seems to have become the adjective I've adopted for me and my theories.

Don't laugh. I'd rather be ridiculous than redundant, or redonculous. That's not a real word, [at least not one in my old dictionaries,] but I like how it sounds. I also don't mind being recumbent.

I have been distressed about my hair since I was 12. The styles then, were bouffant, but you still needed straight hair for it to stay nice and look right. Of course, thin straight hair probably wasn't so hot either, but I don't think at that age I had a whole lot of empathy for straight haired girls. Or anyone for that matter. I learned to deal with it. Not well, but back then, I didn't have much choice. *(AD) I did a home hair straightening at around age 17. It looked great for a day. Then I washed it and it was like someone had poured a bottle of glue on my head. Hello short hair. It grew back. Then I used to blow dry it with the contraptions we had then, that had a hose and a shower cap bonnet> I would dry my hair while it was wrapped around my head with two ginormous rollers as anchors at the top. Since my hair was thick, I had to repeat this procedure in the other direction. This process took about three hours.

Every day, before leaving for school, I would dial the weather on the phone to check the humidity. If it was humid, I would wear a hat and tuck my hair under my coat or jacket. I was 16 and very insecure. Surprise! Thinking on it now, it may have been a coping mechanism due to the loss of my sister and my parent's marriage falling apart. And that too, is another story for another day.

More Current History

It was watching the Oprah show, that I first learned about the art of Japanese hair straightening. OMG! I was so psyched I couldn't contain my joy. Unfortunately I had to. My hair was fairly short and I had to wait several really long months to grow my hair enough so it could be straightened. But I did it. I even went for two consultations with places in Manhattan that Oprah had mentioned. I think I felt quite "chic" going to Oprah's actual suggestions.

And then I had it done. That, was a nightmare, but the results were worth it.

It felt weird at first. Seeing myself with a smooth head. I felt shorter. It looked like something was missing. However,

I got used to it and haven't been a frizz head since. I've either had it straightened or worn is super short, or ironed it.

LESS CURRENT HISTORY

When I was 15 the only way you could iron your hair was if you had an iron, an ironing board and a willing friend. It was rather dangerous, painful and not so effective. So I gave that up.

Me at age 14 and 18.

An Aside:

I also have flat feet. It's kind of related. I couldn't get comfortable high heels and got back problems and bunions from pronating. High heels are sexy, like hair.

FLIGHT OF FANCY

A few years ago, in this age of miracles, I began to wonder: how different would my life have been,had I had my mother's beautiful thick, straight hair and her high arches instead of dad's waves and flat feet.

Dad is on the bottom left, Mom is on the top right. Of course her hair was permed.

I tried to believe that I would have had much more self esteem and so therefore my life would have been so much better. I told you before I could be shallow. Given the skills my parents had, though, I still would have felt like road kill regardless, but fantasies offer a taste of what could have been. In looking at this fantasy, I realized that I certainly was not alone with my concerns about my hair.

And so I began to think about how EVERYONE seems to have concerns.

THE QUESTION: WHY AND HOW LONG HAVE HUMANS BEEN OBSESSED ABOUT THEIR APPEARANCES, ESPECIALLY WITH THEIR HAIR?????

From Wiki

Throughout times, people have worn their hair in a wide variety of styles, largely determined by the fashions of the culture they live in. Hairstyles are markers and signifiers of social class, age, marital status, racial identification, political beliefs, and attitudes about gender.
In many cultures, often for religious reasons, women's hair is covered while in public, and in some, such as Haredi Judaism or European Orthodox communities, women's hair is shaved or cut very short, and covered with wigs.^[3] Only since the end of World War I have women begun to wear their hair short and in fairly natural styles.^[4]

The Venus of Brassempouy

Paleolithic

The oldest known reproduction of hair braiding lies back about 30,000 years: the Venus of Willendorf, now known in academia as the Woman of Willendorf, of a female figurine from the Paleolithic, estimated to have been made between about 28,000 and 25,000 BCE.^[5] The Venus of Brassempouy counts about 25,000 years old and indisputably shows hairstyling.
In Bronze Age razors were known and in use by some men, but not on a daily basis since the procedure was rather unpleasant and required resharpening of the tool which reduced its endurance.^[6]

Ancient history

In ancient civilizations, women's hair was often elaborately and carefully dressed in special ways. Women coloured their hair, curled it, and pinned it up (ponytail) in a variety of ways. They set their hair in waves and curls using wet clay, which they dried in the sun and then combed out, or else by using a jelly made of quince seeds soaked in water, or curling tongs and curling irons of various kinds.^[7]^[8]

So, we crazy beings have been doing our do's since time began. Pretty interesting if you ask me. Even if you didn't ask me. How would I know? You never write, you never call, you never comment. Therefore, you'll get what I want until you let me know what you want.

^{I just looked up the words hair and
sex. I will only say that there did not appear to be any scholarly research on
the subject. There was mention of body hair which I will only touch upon
, (or not) in trying to understand its evolutionary need. Things that didn't help us
survive were shed along the way. From what it looks like, a lot of that was full body hair. At least for most men. I'm not sure if I'll be able to find any
research on this subject. If not. I'll just make it up. Using my extensive
knowledge of psychology, people and bullshitting.}

WIKI AGAIN

A special case of natural selection is sexual selection, which is selection for any trait that increases mating success by increasing the attractiveness of potential mates.^[124] Traits that evolved through sexual selection are particularly prominent among males of several animal species. Although sexually favored, traits such as cumbersome antlers, mating calls, large body size and bright colors often attract predation, which compromises the survival , this survival disadvantage is balanced by higher reproductive success in males that show these hard-to-fake, sexually selected traits.

* me, not Wiki. Hard to fake. I like that. Wigs, comb overs, liposuction, penis extensions, face work. No wonder we're producing so many individuals who could not actually survive on their own. Example. Man, aged 38, still living at mom's. Enough said.
Hmm..... They seemed to focus on the attractiveness of males. And, if you remember your biology, males of all other species are the more colorful and attractive of the two sexes. It's only in humans that things got reversed. Why did that flip? Is it possible that this is what happens to the species who has can think and has opposable thumbs. Which you really, really need if you're combing or braiding your hair.

WHAT DOES ANY OF THIS MEAN OR HAVE TO DO WITH THE PRICE OF EGGS?

^{Nice pun and idiom. I'm patting myself on the back but you can't see me.}

^{America was built on Puritanical principles. Although we went through the sexual revolution in the 60's and 70's, I am old enough to be clueless about today's youth culture and their actual practices and attitudes about sex and reproduction. However, they still seem to be quite keen on hair.}

^{"I'm having a bad hair day"}

^{Given what you've just read, you might now understand why this is really an important, statement and not just some flippant remark.}

^{ACTUAL FACT}

^{I don't know if you realize that the first thing an individual notices about someone they meet, or see, is their gender. Not race which you might think would be first. Not even age. It seem to register, almost unconsciously.}

^{It seems that we need to know how to classify this individual by their sex.}

^{This appears to be instinctive.}

^{Back to evolution and survival. I'm a cave man. I see you across the horizon. Are you friend or foe? I must know if I am to get out of this situation alive. Can I tell from the distance? I suppose if you are hairy all over and have facial hair and head hair, I better gear up.}

^{Hair, Dok*, stick with hair. I seem to have digressed upon the Serengeti.}

^{Hair is a symbol of virility and sexuality.}

^{Way back when, when I would have been decorating an actual cave, not just a man cave, we were probably lucky to live to be 20 or 25. Hair was therefore vital to passing down one's jeans. No, I meant genes. oops. I mean in having children before you died. That is of course assuming you can't have children after you've died. Well, you can now, but you couldn't then. Unless those ice age people were smarter than we thought. As you can see. I can't stay on topic for long.}

^{Attraction to the opposite sex was vital. And apparently still is. (That is kind of funny. Like it never stopped being vital.)}

^{Our hair was probably one of the ways to tell whether we had a disease or were in someway not a good choice to pass on our genetic code. *(AD) {Not that that was what the man was thinking. Not consciously. He was still like probably, ooh, there goes a piece of meat. I'd like to give it to her. Let me club her on the head and see if she puts up a fight. }}

^{Like glowing skin ( not from radiation) or uneven features or things that made us look different from everyone else.}

^{Listen and look at the commercials. "Your hair will look healthy and full and feel silky and glow and bla bla bla."}

^{For men, balding is the ultimate enemy. I'm not sure why curly and/or frizzy hair is "unsexy" on men, or when bald, but not balding, became a turn on for women.}

^{Obviously there were cultural factors long ago that have changed.}

^Alas,

^{No matter how old we get, we still think of ourselves in such a way as to want to be seen as attractive, if not sexy.}

^{Hair seems to be the crowning glory of that symbol.}

^{The hairstyles change over the millennia. But the fact remains, that hair still rules.}

^{*Dok is how I spell Doc.}

^{PS. I was born in 1949. If I was being reincarnated , I did not take the future into account. Wavy hair was in and if that's why I chose it, I hope I learned from my selection. If we are allowed a glimpse of the possible futures, next time around, I'll pay more attention to hair and feet. Please don't judge me.}